Calling All Beauty Beginners: How To Jumpstart Your Regime Without Having An Anxiety Attack

  Photo by Eylül Aslan

 Photo by Eylül Aslan

Let’s face it: The beauty industry has a few barriers to entry. Products are expensive. What looks effortlessly chic on your best friend may turn you into an acne-ridden ogre. Makeup tutorial videos are, frankly, traumatizing.

When I took my first beauty steps, what made me want to drop everything and become agoraphobic (seriously, what a chill lifestyle…) was the sheer amount of beauty products on the market. There is a seemingly infinite array of products, and that’s before you even venture into the world of services and treatments. Where the hell do you even BEGIN? (Hint: NOT with the salesperson who looks like Steven Tyler’s Vegas impersonator.)

Ladies and gentlemen, the curtain ‘bout to be LIFTED. I have the 3-step guide to beginning your beauty journey: Lashes, lips, and luminosity.

Before you fall into a contouring, highlighting, sugaring, lip-kitting, brow-tinting anxiety attack, you must begin with the basics. Not only do you have to phase yourself into the routine of wearing products and doing your makeup, you have to phase in your audience (social media following, friends, family, coworkers) as well. This is very important. There is nothing more jarring than seeing someone who never wears makeup show up one day in full on Kylie-face like it’s NOTHING. Trust me.

Begin with your lashes.

If you never wear makeup, seeing yourself with mascara for the first time can be an awakening in itself. You may feel the urge to add some eyeliner or shadow but trust me – at the beginning, mascara is all you need. Stage makeup is for the STAGE, honey. Let’s take it step by step.

Then, find a natural lip shade that brightens your face.

Resist the urge to go straight for the brightest red or pink – stick with something that’s a little lighter than your lips. You’d be surprised how much a subtle lip, combined with mascara, can wake up your face and energize your natural look (ie. make your hangover a little less apparent).

Third, luminosity.

This can come from a blush, a highlighter, a foundation, or even a moisturizer. Basically, you just want to add some life to your face… without adding a layer of skin. Personally, I think blush has the most brightening effect with the least amount of effort. Once you get to know me, you’ll realize that I LOVE maximizing any effect while putting in the least amount of effort. If there were a Sanskrit symbol for that, I’d be getting a tattoo of it removed from my lower back right now.

No matter if you’re a makeup novice, or if you’re fifteen minutes late for work and don’t have time for a full face (or a shower…), the three L’s will wake up your look and get you through the day, without your annoyingly peppy coworker commenting that you look “exhausted” or “stressed.” Bitch, I showed up, didn’t I?